Late again

Gosh, what a week - so much to say, but I really have no idea how to say it.

After seeing the Psych on Monday (see previous post) I've been pretty much walking on air all week and nothing has really sunk in - I actually really feel like for once I am making significant progress rather than just blowing about in the breeze, heading in all directions. Following my appointment I have felt hugely empowered with a new found confidence and actually deeply happy - I really can't remember the last time that I felt this good.

Stemming from my state of mind on Monday evening, I put a request in at work - that I should be allowed to attend in female guise on Wednesday and it caused a bit of a hoo-ha and a descision was not forthcoming throughout the whole of the day - my manager called me in for a chat (45 mins after she should have gone home) and apologised for the lack of answer but suggested that I should take the action I felt most appropriate in the morning, but be prepared to use the male facilities when dressed if need be. It made for a very stressful day indeed.

Anyway, Wednesday morning came and I made my descision although I hadn't heard anything from the office, when I arrived I was immediately pulled into one of the side rooms and told that a descision had been made - I could attend in female guise, and use female facilities. I was over the moon and I had definately made the right choice in my black "office" skirt, red top and of course the now obligatory scarf (maroon/black) throughout the day I got nothing but positive reactions and some amazing offers of assistance from those who I would never expect to do so. Really fantastic day.

Thursday and Friday were slightly nothing-ish days really in that I only mooched around the house and did little things - there is however one significant event in that for the first time ever I went out with only foundation on, I normally wouldn't even get within six foot of the front door without at least foundation, blusher and lippy - so I guess thats a small step forwards too.

Saturday was, of course, the day of the Pride parade and all the work that we have put into the companys involvment and the float came to fruition. I'm yet to see any photos of me from the event but the local paper (the Argus) has this picture of the Amex float on their website front page

I think it gives a good indication of just how fab our float was. The parade was, as ever, great fun and the park a bit of a let down (not allowed to take drinks in) and in order to have fun you'd need to spend a fortune. Having spent a short while in the park I ran home (on the bus) to get changed for the evening do at work and after a great deal of eating drinking and smoking (no more from now on) it was time to move on - whilst many folks headed on to St. James street I felt like I'd hit my limit, I'd not eaten a great deal and drunk too much so time to head home before it got messy.

I came home to a message from Tree saying that a letter from Hove Polyclinic had arrived and did I want to know the contents? She read it over the phone and it was my referral letter - its been done and sent! I'm going to ring CX on Monday next week just to check its been recieved and processed. The letter contained a large amount of personal details, and a few errors, which I feel might need correcting but I do want to share the last paragraph, which left me feeling pretty damned good

"He presented at the assesment today in appropriate and sucessful female attire with long hair and make up, clearly female trousers and top. He has deliberately lost 4 stone in weight over the past year which has had pleasing effects on his body shape. He seems to be making a well thought through descision to persue the gender reassignment process at this time"

Aside from the use of male pronouns - which I guess is down to convention, I'm really pleased with that, especially the comments on pleasing body shape and that I am making a well thought through descision.

Sunday was the day of the roast dinner and Tree came to see my new abode for the first time, she and Veryan, the landlady, hit it off almost immediatly and Sammydog seemed to fall in love with her too. A great meal was cooked and eaten and a fantastic evening of chat and fun was had. Having walked Tree to the bus it was time to wave goodbye to an amazing week.

So, what has the week that was taught me? Following on from my day at work I am more convinced than ever that I am following the right track and I'm now trying to work through when its going to be feasible for me to go full time at work - I'm still going to attend in male guise until that point, I think that regular chopping and changing isn't going to do me any favours.

I keep being drawn to 01 Jan 2012 but I really need to get something done about the face fuzz before I feel I can do it - I'm going to spend 20mins a night playing with the home IPL machine to see if I can make any difference. I need to give 2 months notice at work really and if I can make some progress into the tache/beard area then it may still be viable but really I need to find the money to pay for a whole course of treatment (£1200 for 8 sessions) and the time for it to work as its a long process.

Peace and Love.

Danni x